“Val the Bartender” is a wise, wise woman. She’s so savvy, in fact, that she should be Hillary Clinton‘s new confidante who whispers in her ear when she isn’t sure about issues that could dog her in a campaign, like the timing on announcing her opposition to the Keystone XL Pipeline or her support of gay marriage:
SNL Hillary: “I could have supported [gay marriage] sooner.”
Val: “You supported it pretty soon.”
SNL Hillary: “Could have been sooner.”
Val: “Fair point.”
Yes, the SNL Val the Bartender skit was comedy. But we all know that good comedy starts with an essential truth – think Kathy Griffin on reality TV stars or Amy Schumer on how women are perceived in Hollywood. The truth that made us all laugh at Hillary Clinton’s most recent SNL moment is that if Hillary lets her hair down a bit, kicks off those sensible tan business shoes, and channels her inner Val, it will resonate with voters.
Forget John Podesta and Robby Mook. If Hillary Clinton truly wants to be the next president of the United States and first grandmother-in-chief, then she should immediately promote Val to be her top adviser and she should do whatever Val tells her to.
Think about it. We all have an inner Val – that little inner voice in our head or the imaginary person perched on our shoulder that represents the obvious answer that’s there even when we think we are struggling and debating a hard choice – and when we don’t listen to her we often regret it. Even politicians have one, though many times they don’t want to admit the presence of their inner voice if it goes against what seems to be politically expedient or convenient. Mahatma Gandhi said, “Everyone who wills can hear their inner voice. It is within everyone.”
And that just might be the key to a Hillary White House win, because Val will keep her real. Whether the “authenticity” thing should be a question for Clinton or not doesn’t really matter – voters, especially women, have made up their minds on that one. So in addition to talking about policies she favors and how she’d lead as the first woman president, Hillary needs to do it in a way that would make her inner Val happy. Maybe if Val had been around in 2008, Hillary would be winding down her political career right about now and could take that “veck-a-cution” (SNL Hillary speak for vacation), and kick back with grandbaby Charlotte.
If Hillary listens to her inner Val she just might have the 2016 Democratic nomination in the bag. Watch out, Huma. There’s a new campaign BFF in town. And her name is Val!